/u/[deleted]'s posts in /r/TwoSentenceComedy

Year:

Only show posts with narrations

I’m trying to be funny while avoiding my usual puns, sarcasm, and off-color humor.

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"This part of the of the Garden is clearly mine, it says so in the agreement!", his neighbour screamed at the angry, young, first-time home owner.

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If you don’t stay positive there isn’t a door that won’t be opened to you.

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Not sure what's more empty.

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Although I've been isolating at home all year, who tells me I need a quick scan and a 'fix now'?

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I'm sure at least one Brit can attest to the following phrases; ' I brought these shoes, I brought new make up, I brought a sandwich.'

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My friend lied in his application and said he has "15 years of experience in playing piano"

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I was surprised when my family was supportive of me doing porn.

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If there’s a version of me in a parallel universe, I’d like to cross paths with him some day.

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I love to go to IKEA and then wander about trying to pronounce the names of the furniture

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
I’m trying to be funny while avoiding my usual puns, sarcasm, and off-color humor.	1
"This part of the of the Garden is clearly mine, it says so in the agreement!", his neighbour screamed at the angry, young, first-time home owner.	1
If you don’t stay positive there isn’t a door that won’t be opened to you.	1
Not sure what's more empty.	1
Although I've been isolating at home all year, who tells me I need a quick scan and a 'fix now'?	1
I'm sure at least one Brit can attest to the following phrases; ' I brought these shoes, I brought new make up, I brought a sandwich.'	1
My friend lied in his application and said he has "15 years of experience in playing piano"	1
I was surprised when my family was supportive of me doing porn.	1
If there’s a version of me in a parallel universe, I’d like to cross paths with him some day.	1
I love to go to IKEA and then wander about trying to pronounce the names of the furniture	1